Redesign Thanksgiving : Or Else

Although I got the week off for thanksgiving, thanksgiving is a bore. I have a lot to be thankful for. I even made a list, but that doesn’t stop me from hating the holiday. Why does every holiday have to be centered on food? Why do we as American gorge ourselves to maximum capacity then, sit around waiting for the stomach pains to subside? Setting my loathing feelings for thanksgiving styled foods aside, it’s still pathetic. People honestly must not see the error of their ways. After this holiday season I am hoping to experiment with weight gain during the holidays. Then of course drafting pie charts and scatter plots, to show my data collection, and resulting output.
I think we as Americans should redesign thanksgiving. The word “redesign”, does not mean to throw out core values. This holiday is always going to hold the same historical meaning and remembrance. We are always going to have first grade plays, elaborately constructed with construction paper pilgrims and fake feather Native Americans. We don’t want to lose that aspect; it gives us pride and love for our neighbors and friends. But the one small detail that has consumed the holiday whole like a snake consumes a pretty white rabbit is thanksgiving dinner. It just sets us back come new years, another resolution to lose not just 20 pounds but 25 due to the amount consumed during the holidays. Just think before you swallow.